After the sting has subsided…….

               It’s been a little over a week since Grandpa passed away. While the initial sting has faded, the large hole left in my life is still very apparent. I have spent the first 37 years of my life with my grandfather in it. In some ways, he filled a void left by my own father, especially in more recent years. Grandpa was there to listen to me. He would give me advice, and always had time for me. If I ever went to see him, no matter how he felt, he would roll out the red carpet for me. He took the time to learn my children’s names. He didn’t do it because he felt he had to, but rather because he wanted to. He always told me how well behaved my children were, and complimented me on my parenting. He knew what each of my kids were like and always took the time to talk to them and of course, tease them the way Grandpa was famous for.           

          He wasn’t like this when he was younger. I remember a time when Grandpa was very salty, had little time for kids or grandkids, and wasn’t so pleasant. With age and infirmity, he was humbled. The man he would become because of these things was wonderful.                    

          As I sat here this morning, I was flipping through my genealogy information and I was looking at all of these names & dates. Every name in my file was somebody’s parent, grandparent, spouse, friend, child - you name it. I sit here and think of all the gaping holes that each one of these people left in the lives of those who loved them. I also think of the gaping holes that were left in their lives when their loved ones died. Death is a part of life. There is no escaping that reality.           

          So what can be done? Well, we cannot defeat death in our mortal state. Nobody here on earth will live in their corporeal body forever. We must accept that we will all feel the sting of death and loss throughout our life until we ourselves die, and leave a hole in someone else’s life. The best we can do is cherish those around us while we are blessed to have them with us. We can also live a life full of giving, kindness, and compassion. The seeds we sow today will be the fruit we reap tomorrow. We can also live our lives in a way that honors those loved ones who lived before us. We can try to be the best people we can possibly be and make the memory of our loved ones an honorable one.