My 2013 was pretty shitty.

            Years that end in “3” just seem to stink for me. In 1983, my sister died. In 1993, I grew to hate school and dropped out of high school. I grew tired of my job and quit it. I became extremely broke and I remember by the time December of 1993 rolled around, I was destitute with very little positive outlook. It wasn’t until February of 1994 when I found a decent job that I stuck at for any length of time. It paid well. 1993 sucked though. 2003 was the year that we had to adjust to losing KinDee’s boys in a bitter custody battle. Work became slow and it became very hard to pay bills. I had a full time job, but after child support, there wasn’t much left because there just wasn’t much work to be had. Now I have just gone through 2013 and it has been a really trying year.

            First, let me start by saying that I feel blessed that I have a roof over my head and my kids are healthy. Those two things are the most important. However, this is a year that I lost a lot of things. First, I lost our school. In February they voted to end Valley and join with North Fayette and I opposed it vehemently. I had to take nerve pills to help me sleep. In March, my final remaining grandparent passed away, Grandpa Kane. That made me feel like crap. His generation is nearly gone and it feels lonely. Shortly thereafter, I watched as my neighbor moved out. The people who moved in are not like the guy who moved out. I got along well with my old neighbor. These new people just aren’t the type of people that I am friendly with. I don’t drink, I don’t ride motorcycles, and I don’t believe in letting your dog shit in another’s yard.

            I’ve had vehicle troubles left and right. My wood furnace took a dump on me. I got both of them fixed, but at a considerable expense. Everything has just been a giant struggle this year. Even this Christmas wasn’t as enjoyable as I would have hoped. It was just chaotic as hell. Both KinDee and I have had fights with our exes which have caused considerable stress. My health is still failing which depresses me. Our garden didn’t do for shit. Our beloved cat disappeared in August. I had my bathroom remodeled in August, but it wasn’t done the way I had hoped and I had a lot of stress from that. It has just been one thing after another this year.

            I know I’m missing quite a few things that went to hell this year as I quickly write this tonight. News stations like to take a look back at the year that was right about now. I’m doing the same here in written fashion. 2013 has been a crappy year. It could have been worse, but it sure as hell could have been better. 2012 wasn’t nearly as bad. I’m hoping 2014 is much better. I don’t seem to do too bad in years that end in “4”, but in a couple of those years, 1994 and 2004, big changes came to my life. I left home and moved to this area in 1994 and I bought my home here in Wadena in 2004. I really could use a good 2014 after the shitty 2013 I had.

My DR RapidFire, one year later……..

Well, I’ve now owned my RapidFire for a little over a year now and I have put it through it’s paces. I’m happy with certain aspects of it, and had some minor issues elsewhere. First, the good news;

It splits wood fast. It has only gotten better the more I use it. When it’s shipped to you, it has paint on everything and that creates drag. Now that the paint has worn off of the moving parts, it allows the moving parts to move easier, with less drag. That matters on a rack and pinion style splitter. I would also surmise that the engine has broken in and engines generally gain a little power after a break in period. I did change the oil after running the machine about 10-15 hours. I think the manual said to change it after the first five hours. My oil still looked good, but I changed it anyhow. 

I split approximately 20 to 30 full sized pickup loads of hardwood this past year. I don’t sell firewood, but I like to have a decent pile of it. Almost everything I split is hickory, elm, or oak. I do split some other hardwoods like mulberry, horn hopbeam, etc, but the first three I mentioned are the main ones. This splitter splits oak like nobody’s business. Elm and hickory, especially hickory, are entirely different matters. 

Oak splits nicely with the machine. Many times the piece splits in two before the blade is halfway through the piece. Elm and hickory by their nature are stringy woods. The RapidFire splits elm fairly well, but if you get a larger piece on the table, it starts to have trouble. Elm is generally pretty heavy, especially if fresh cut. I have found it is better to split a large round of elm by taking pieces off around the perimeter of the piece as opposed to trying to split down the middle. Smaller pieces aren’t a problem for the RapidFire except for knotted pieces and areas where you find a “crotch”, an area where one branch grew off of the main branch. It is these crotch areas where the wood grain goes in different directions that you have trouble mainly with elm and hickory. It will power through most oak knots and crotches if not too large. Elm and hickory knots and crotches will bring the RapidFire nearly to it’s knees. Many a time we’ve had to beat a piece of firewood off of the splitting wedge on the RapidFire. Well, it’s mainly my stepson who runs into this problem. I do pretty well by looking at the wood and splitting around trouble areas, especially if visible. 

Hickory is about the most difficult wood that I have split with the RapidFire and it’s the wood that it has the toughest time with. The hickory that I am cutting and splitting is shellbark, shagbark, and pignut hickory. Hickory has been used historically for tool handles and is known as one of the toughest woods out there. Andrew Jackson was nicknamed “Old Hickory” because of his perceived toughness and unbending nature. The hickory that I split is full of small knots throughout the wood and they will nearly stop the machine. You can’t see all of the knots that are in the wood. The DR RapidFire sure finds them! We manage to get along well though. You just need to pay attention to what you’re doing and when splitting hickory or elm, try splitting around the perimeter and be prepared to retract the ram should you hit a knot. 

I had some constructive criticism for DR in my initial review. I see DR has made changes to this splitter. The engine is mounted different, the logo is now smaller and looks much better, and most of all, it is road towable. I wish I had the current model instead of the one I have, but that is life. It’s customers like me who have made it possible for people today to get a better machine. 

I have two complaints after one year of using the machine. The first is belt squeal. I get a lot of it, even with the belts taught. I wonder if small belt slips over an extended period of time don't glaze the belt and reduce it’s friction ability? It has only been one year and I think I need a new set of belts. The other complaint is that my handle fell off. It’s two pieces and the weld was bad. I took it to our local welder who put it back on for $10. He even said that the weld was poor and didn’t burn in properly from the factory. Other than that, it has been a faithful machine. You have to learn how to use it as it’s a different beast than a hydraulic splitter. If this one blew away in a tornado, I’d be in the market to purchase another one, especially now that it can be towed down the road!

 

Homeschooling Progress

November 20th – I have been homeschooling Karen since the beginning of the school year. She would be in the first grade at public school, but is advanced. I have her clipping right along and we are nearly through the first grade math book. I have only been using the book as a reference and cherry picking some of the pages out of it, especially those with word problems. I really think we’ll be doing second grade math after Christmas and I will have to purchase the books.

                Jenna started homeschooling in early October. She’s been doing well too. She is nearly through Chapter 3 in her “Go Math!” book. Chapter 2 dealt with fractions and we had to wade through that in detail because Jenna didn’t have a good grasp of it. She is a math whiz when it comes to fractions now! That’s what good old 1 on 1 can do for a child! It also was a nice refresher for me.

              Chapter 3 deals with absolute value and introduces her to negative numbers. It’s a cinch at this point, but will get trickier when we start using negative numbers in math problems. We should have chapter 3 wrapped up by Thanksgiving.

              Jenna is also working on her autobiography. It has been slow going but it’s rather lengthy. Look for it on her blog in the next few weeks. You can find her blog here: www.jenna.durnanfamily.com

                Sean started homeschooling in late October and we have had to throw the books away for him. He obviously has been allowed to pass through the grades without having mastered basic math. No more number lines for him! It’s all standard algorithm from here on out as that’s what he seems to understand best. I have him doing large addition and large subtraction where he has to borrow and carry. I am also having him do math drills in basic addition, subtraction, multiplication, and division. His skills are slowly sharpening. I am very proud of the progress that he is making. I also have him doing 1st grade math right along-side Karen. It’s good review for him and in some cases, he is having difficulty with some of it! I am not going to teach Sean any new math until he gets the basics mastered. End of story. This is what should have happened with him in the public school. Maybe they couldn’t have done it there, but I have that freedom here to home.
                Jenna is doing science from the Spectrum series. Next year I’ll start with biology, earth science, and chemistry. Not all at once though! Each year we’ll pick a new subject. Karen and Sean are doing the same science from the Spectrum series. They just learned about magnetism together and this week are working on learning about weather. We took a break from the planets right now and we’ll return to them after Thanksgiving.
                All three kids are doing language arts. Jenna and Karen are doing the Treasures series that they were doing in school. We’re doing one story per week. Sean was not up to snuff with his grammar so I am only using the Treasures series for his spelling. His grammar is coming from a different book that I found on Amazon. It is used for homeschooling and is taking Sean back through the basics. Right now we’re dealing with nouns. Sean couldn’t even tell you what a noun was when I started home schooling him. He can tell you what they are now, but he’s still struggling. The beauty of home schooling is that I can keep working with him until he gets it. He doesn’t advance until he does.
                Sean is doing American History. He is reading about Christopher Columbus right now. I’ve timed it so that we’ll be reading about the pilgrims next week! He is enjoying it. Karen isn’t doing history yet and neither is Jenna. Jenna is next up for Sean’s American History book, followed by Karen. I’ll be adding more History and Geography lessons soon.
                There’s so much more to add, but suffice to say, the kids are thriving in the homeschool environment. I’ll describe our typical school day. We wake up at 7 a.m. This is later than what we were waking up when the kids attended public school. Normally they’d have to catch a bus at 7:20. There isn’t this mass chaos in the morning anymore and that’s been a blessing. We wake up and have breakfast. Our school day starts at 9 a.m. We school until Noon. We take a break from Noon to 1 for dinner and then school from about 1 until 3. That’s a typical day. Of course, we have the luxury of tweaking that schedule should we need to. I’ve been schooling as late as 8 P.M. on days where I’ve had to. I try and get my kids to get their work done in 4 days and on Friday, we can watch television or do other fun things. If not, then it’s schooling on Friday too! We pack a lot into the 5 hours of schooling per day. The kids also get library time and they also get to go for walks with my wife for exercise.
                My kids don’t have to ride that bus for half an hour each way anymore. They don’t have all that “fluff” that goes along with a public school education. My kids are learning and they’re doing damned good if I do say so myself. If you ask them about what they’re learning, they’ll tell you. Karen can already tell time to the nearest 5 minutes, and if she has a clock that she can read the minutes on in front of her, she can tell you to the minute! She can identify numbers up to a million and she can add 5 digit numbers over top 5 digit numbers! She knows her addition and subtraction facts up to 20 and she can tell you measurements on a ruler to the nearest half inch. It’s only November and she can do this! She can read at nearly a fourth grade level, and she’s just flying through this stuff. I’m so proud of her! This wouldn't be the case if she had stayed in public school. I’m so glad that I’ve made this move.
              I've also been having the kids read a lot too. I am using Pizza Hut's Book It program where the kids can earn a free personal pan pizza for meeting their monthly goals. Their calendars are up and they write down how much they read a day. Karen's monthly goal is 400 minutes. Sean's is 600 minutes and Jenna's is 800 minutes. Karen and Sean struggle as they don't like to read alone the way Jenna does. I enjoyed having that program as a kid and so far, Jenna has been the only one who earned a pizza. She met her goal last month and looks to be on target to meet it this month as well. The other two have their work cut out for them!
                Stop and visit with my kids if you want to see what they’re up to. I keep the work that they’re doing and can show anyone the progress that they’re making. They enjoy showing off what they know!

 

CPI – Option 2

            CPI option 1 mainly deals with having a human being oversee your homeschooling program. Either the school provides you with a teacher (HSAP option) or you go out and procure your own teacher (Supervising Teacher option). CPI option 2 doesn’t require a teacher, but instead, you use testing to show the state that you are teaching your child. It’s this option that has changed and is causing some confusion right now.

            CPI option 2 has two options; Opt-In reporting and Opt-Out reporting. The Opt-In is the same as it has always been the best I can tell. You have your child tested and you supply your local school district with the results of those tests in a timely manner. With the law change, you can now “opt out” meaning that you don’t have to tell the school anything. This is where it becomes a little fuzzy. With CPI option 1, you still fill out the Form A. With option 2, you don’t have to fill any form out. I’m not even sure what kind of notification you have to give the school. It’s really a gray area right now and personally, I would advise against option 2 unless you know what you’re doing or have a good lawyer at your disposal. I wouldn’t be surprised to see some sort of clarification on this option in upcoming years. Option 2, Opt-Out reporting, does seem to allow you to have your kids to take annual testing at the local school for free. Under the IPI, you don’t have that option. However, under option 2, it doesn’t appear that you can open enroll, but if you Opt-In and choose to report to the school, you can dual enroll.

            If this sounds confusing, it’s because I’m confused by the "opt out" option myself. I would highly recommend you choose option 1 if you want to have access to dual enrollment and testing and don’t want a supervising teacher of any sort. It's a lot more straight-forward and simple to understand. Otherwise, I recommend going with the IPI where the rules are also pretty clear. The only difference between the IPI and CPI option 2 Opt-Out that I can see is access to free testing at school. I think those under the IPI can access free testing at the local AEA (Area Education Agency). There may be some differences in being able to teach driver’s education to your child but those details haven’t even been clarified yet as far as I know to date (November 2013).

            CPI option 2 looks like it would be appealing to those who want the benefits that go along with dual enrollment through school without the hassle of a HSAP teacher or procuring the services of a teacher of your own out of pocket. As stated earlier, testing will be made available through your school or your local AEA. You have more freedom under the CPI option 2 than you do a HSAP, and you don’t have to worry about finding and keeping a teacher happy. As long as your kids show progress in their testing, you should be good. 

            I can’t possibly cover all the issues and topics that surround homeschooling in Iowa here. There are websites chock full of information out there. There are groups that you can join that will also help show you the ropes. Just do a Google search for them. You’ll have no trouble finding them out there. All I have wanted to do here was show you how easy it is to homeschool should you decide to do so.

            I have chosen the IPI option here my first year. I did it because it was the quickest and easiest way to get into homeschooling while allowing time to learn more about it myself. I may choose a different option next year depending on what it is that I think I may want from our school. If I don’t need any classes or testing from our local school, I will just keep choosing the IPI option. I like freedom and the IPI truly gives me that. I wish you the best of luck should you decide to pursue homeschooling. I have been at it for four months now and I love it. My kids are doing some really terrific things and we’re building a bond that most parents can only dream of having!

CPI option 1 – Supervising Teacher

 CPI option 1 – Supervising Teacher            

               I have covered the IPI option, and CPI option 1 – HSAP. Today, I cover the other CPI option 1 choice. CPI option 1 is different from option 2 in the regards that under option 1, there is a real person that you must interact with who will supervise your homeschooling experience. Option 2 is more about testing and I’ll cover that in upcoming posts.

               We know that under the HSAP option, the school provides you with a supervising teacher. Under the Supervising Teacher option, you provide your own teacher. There are teachers in Iowa who you can hire to be your supervising teacher. Maybe you’re lucky and you have a teacher’s certificate, or maybe you have a family member with a teaching certificate? All you need for this option it seems is a teacher who has a current folder on file with the Iowa Department of Education. A folder is technically a teaching license. It is also recommended that you find a teacher whose folder reflects those areas of teaching that pertain to what you are teaching at home.

               This supervising teacher will meet with your child twice per quarter, face to face. The school cannot dictate which subjects to teach your child. No annual testing is required. All you do is write the name of your supervising teacher on the CPI Form A where indicated and that’s all you have to do. You still have to show proof of up to date immunizations with your first filing of Form A.

•                This option also allows for dual enrollment with the school. Just make sure that you check that option on Form A where indicated.

•                You can choose this option anytime during the school-year, but must file Form A within 14 days of pulling your child out of school.

               I would also note; your supervising teacher is your link between homeschooling the way you want to, and running afoul with the school. It seems imperative that you find a supervising teacher with a like-minded vision for educating your child.

 

CPI option 1 – HSAP

CPI option 1 – HSAP 

               In my last blog post, I mentioned the IPI option for homeschooling in Iowa. Today, I’ll start wading through the other homeschool options currently available to Iowa families. While IPI is an option all its own, the CPI (Competent Private Instruction) has four separate options which make the CPI a little more tricky. What adds to the ambiguity is the fact that the Iowa Legislature changed a lot of stuff this year (2013) and it’s not really all cut and dry. CPI has two option, and with each of those two options, are two more options. Today, I’ll focus on CPI option 1 – HSAP 

               Just a note to the reader – understand; I have never homeschooled under the CPI option. I am fairly new to this myself. I may have chosen the CPI option if it weren’t so confusing. The CPI option 1 – HSAP is probably the least confusing of the CPI options, but it’s also the one you may find the hardest to utilize. What it depends upon is whether or not your school offers a HSAP. HSAP stands for Home School Assistance Program. Under this option, the school assigns you a supervising teacher. This supervising teacher will hold your hand during home schooling. They will help supervise you and they are required by law to meet face to face with your child a certain number of times per quarter. I believe it’s currently 4 times per quarter. If your school does not offer a HSAP, this option is unavailable to you unless you open enroll into a school which offers a HSAP. Marion Independent Schools in Marion, Iowa supposedly has a very successful HSAP and it’s my understanding that a lot of people open enroll in their school just to have access to their HSAP.  

               Depending on the school, you may pick your own curriculum, or the school may choose it for you. Many HSAPs I understand provide curriculum for you if asked. Remember this though, if you choose the HSAP option, you are obligated to teach your child whatever the school tells you if they choose. They have that right under the HSAP rules. If you don’t like their curriculum, this may not be the best option for you.

               If you want your child to have access to classes at school such as band, art, or anything else that you’re not able to or comfortable teaching, then you have the option to dual enroll. This also opens the door for those of you who want your children to participate in sports. If you wish to utilize these services from the school, you must choose the dual enrollment option. Dual enrollment is not available to IPI. If you want your kids to participate in sports, choose one of these CPI options.

               You must fill out Form A which is available from the Iowa Department of Education website. Every CPI option requires that this form be filled out. You also need to have proof of immunizations filed with the school. You can choose this option anytime during the school year, but must file Form A within 14 days of pulling your child out of school. Also, it’s my understanding that the school does not have to enroll your child into the HSAP program after a certain date in the school year. It seems to have something to do with funding.  My advice to you is to make your choice before school starts and make sure your paperwork is in before September 1^st. Otherwise, unless you have assurance from your superintendent that they will allow your child into the HSAP after the cutoff date, it may be best to choose another option for the rest of the school year.

               If you wish to consider this option further, I would highly recommend contacting your school’s superintendent.

 

Homeschooling in Iowa 2013

               I have thought about homeschooling for several years now. Every time I sought information on how to homeschool, I seemed to hit roadblocks. It was almost like a secret that outsiders weren’t allowed to be privy to. While I never did ask a current homeschooling family how they homeschooled (because I personally don't know any), I did ask a couple of families that I knew homeschooled in the past. They seriously acted like they didn’t know how they did it and told me to go ask another family.

               When I went to the websites available online to get information, I can honestly tell you that I got confused. It wasn’t a cut and dry process. These websites beat around the bush with a bunch of gobble-dy-gook and never seemed to come out with a step by step process on how to homeschool in Iowa.

               Most of these homeschool websites have a Christian slant to them. That’s all well and good, but the law doesn’t mention religion. What I wanted was to know how to homeschool legally. I want to help clarify how in a few blog posts.

               I am new to homeschooling. So far, everything is going great. I love the freedom. I love spending more time with my kids. I like the thought that when my kids grow up, they’ll be able to say that I was their teacher. Just that thought alone gives me the “warm fuzzies”. 

               So….do you want to homeschool? If the answer is yes, then the first thing you need to do is choose a homeschool option. There are many and the paperwork and information required will be determined by the option you choose. There are two main options currently (late 2013) in Iowa. One is the IPI which is new, and the other is the CPI which has been around for a long time. However, the CPI options are varied and complex.

               Do you want to homeschool your kid now? I mean right now. You can pull your kid out tomorrow and homeschool. While you can pull them out immediately in most cases with the CPI option, the IPI option is the easiest and simplest way to homeschool your child right now.

The IPI Option
 

               To homeschool your child under the IPI, all you need to do is write your school superintendent a letter stating your intent to homeschool your child under the IPI option. It doesn’t need to be fancy. It doesn’t need to have a lot of information. You can simply write, “Dear Mr. or Mrs. XXXXXX, I will be homeschooling my son/daughter (Insert name & date of birth) via the IPI option. This will be effective (insert date). Thank you.” Then sign your name. Make a copy of it. Give one copy to the superintendent’s office and keep the other for yourself. You’re done. Clean out your child’s desk and that’s all there is to it.

               There are a couple of things to keep in mind with the IPI. First, you must teach certain classes to your child. They are; mathematics, reading, language arts, science, and social studies. However, nobody will be coming to your door checking up on this. There are no homeschool police. You’re on your honor under this system, which really upsets those opposed to homeschooling. Truthfully, there are some parents who probably won’t teach their children. I do not advocate pulling your kids out of school unless you plan on teaching them. If you're not going to actually teach your children anything, then you are harming your child. It’s my hope that the information that I will provide in my blog posts will be used by you to make your child’s learning experience better.

               Secondly, you cannot have more than 4 unrelated children homeschooled under the IPI option at once. Again, there are no homeschool police, but if your school catches wind of it, I suppose somebody may come and have a visit with you. 

               Finally, by choosing the IPI, which is the simplest way to homeschool, you wash your hands of the school and they wash their hands of you. You are not eligible for any help from the school. You also don’t have to give any other information to the school. You don’t have to have your children tested. You don’t have to tell the school anything other than the fact that you will be homeschooling under the IPI option.

               In the coming weeks, as I find time to type, and truthfully, as I learn more about homeschooling myself, I will post more information up here. If you have questions, please leave them in the comments section and I will try my best to answer them. 

               I will try and go over the CPI options in my next blog post.

Relief

     I am relieved that KinDee didn’t win a board seat tonight. When the other party who we thought was also going to run chose not to run, it meant that the best KinDee would have done was be one person out of 5 fighting a losing battle against Whole Grade Sharing. Her loss tonight means that she won’t have to be running up to the school for board meetings just to be outvoted at every turn.

     You know, I have always thought about home schooling, but never pursued it. I didn’t know how to go about it. I thought it was terribly complicated. Well, it’s not. Having Valley enter into Whole Grade Sharing turned out to be the push we needed to look into home schooling seriously. Now that I’m home schooling Karen, I want to home school all three of the children that live with me. It’s not that hard. It doesn’t take as much time as I thought it would.

               I don’t have a traditional day with Karen. I home school her a few hours here, a few hours there. She doesn’t have to spend that 90 minutes per day on the bus. She can school in her pajamas. She can eat lunch while learning. If she gets tired, she can take a nap. Karen loves being home schooled. KinDee had to go to the school the other day to get Jenna out early for an eye appointment and Karen went along. Karen got to go in the school again and a few of her old friends waved at her. When Karen came home, I asked her if she missed school and she said that she did not. KinDee said that Karen was afraid that that she’d try to leave her there at the school and that Karen kept asking for reassurance that KinDee was going to be going home with her.

               God as my witness, I haven’t pumped anything into Karen’s head. She wanted to go to school in pre-school. She went for two full years. But, as she went to kindergarten, she said the kids got mean. I know she was picked on while riding the bus and she would come home crying a lot. That ended her desire to want to go to school anymore. She loves being home and being left alone. She’s not a recluse, but she doesn’t like being messed with either. She loves going to the library and going to church. She loves shopping and visiting family. She just hates how kids are at school. Yes, the world is full of bullies, but Karen doesn’t need to put up with it at this point in her life. I feel confident that she’ll be able to handle assholes when she’s older. I’ll see to it that she’s ready.

               Next is Jenna’s turn. I want her to be home schooled now, but she has asked to go at least through Christmas. Even though I don’t want to, I have told her that I will allow her that, but if the school pisses me off between now and then, I’m yanking her.

               Sean is a special case. He has an IEP and is special-ed. We fought like hell to get him that IEP last year and it’s good through this coming spring. I can pull him and home school him now, but if I read the law correctly, I have to get permission from the Iowa Department of Education. I may just let him finish this year out and just ask that his IEP not be renewed. They don’t seem to be doing a damned thing with it this year anyhow. Sean was home from school today and I was giving Karen a math lesson and Sean didn’t even know where to place commas in numbers, or how to even say numbers in the thousands. Take the number 1,348. He said it was one hundred thirty four thousand and eight. He put the comma between the 4 and the 8. The kid is in the 4^th grade!!!

               I have taught Karen to put a comma every third spot and that the commas have names. The first one is thousand. She can identify numbers up to 999, and by knowing the comma’s name, she can identify her numbers up to 999,999. Once I teach her the next comma, Million, she’ll be able to identify numbers up to 999,999,999.

               Whole Grade Sharing has turned out to be a blessing in disguise. Valley is gone. It only exists on a tax statement anymore. It’s North Fayette Valley now and while I will eventually have to pay my property taxes to that mess of an organization, I don’t have to send my kids to it. I am sad though that my children will never graduate from the same school that my father and so many other family members graduated from. I was really looking forward to that. This will be better though. In the end, all we leave on this earth for the most part is our family. I will be my children’s teacher. Not many parents today can say that. I will be one of the lucky few who will be able to. For that, I’m very thankful.

East Buchanan Memories

I attended school at East Buchanan from Kindergarten through the fifth grade. I then went to North Linn where I completed the 11^th grade, and then went about a week and a half of my senior year before dropping out. I did get my GED in 1997 up at Calmar.

I feel like I went to school at a special time, with really neat teachers. I thought it would be fun to write down memories from those years of school. As I age, my memory clouds up more and more. If I have any of these wrong, please correct me, or add your own memories as well. I’ll try to group them together the best I can.

Kindergarten: Mrs. Cook’s class

On the first day of school, I cried. Mrs. Murray comforted me. I never really had a babysitter up to this point and never went to any kind of pre-school. I was scared.

We didn’t go every day of the week. I believe it was every other day.

Doing eye tests by using your hand to point the direction of the letter E.

Wearing those headphones in those cubicles and using a crayon on laminated paper. Mrs. Sauer (I believe that was her name) helped out.

Mrs. Cook would give you a sticker for finishing your lunch.

Monaghan reminded me of Animal Island. I nearly forgot about that.

Nap time.

I actually had a real cigar box for my pencils, etc. That wouldn’t fly today.

Marching around the room, I didn’t like being last, so I budged in line and had to sit in the corner. I was pissed.

Donald knocking over the Christmas tree and breaking my ornament.

Rory Higgins!

Andy Hansen was in our class too.

Melissa Sprague stuttered, but got much better as she got older.

Painting with those backwards shirts on.

Dancing Ducks was the workbook that I worked from. Maybe we all did?

Before the playground was paved. I don’t even remember the chain link fence being like it was a year or two later. I remember flying off of the merry go round and landing face first in the gravel and tore up my upper lip real bad. I’m surprised I can grow a mustache to this day.

Didn’t we ride on the Quasky fire trucks?

I rode bus 11. It only had 48 capacity and was shorter than the others.

At the end of the year, I remember Mrs. Cook saying that she’d watch us grow up and be proud of us. A year or so later, Jason Franck and I were playing outside the kindergarten room and hit a ball into her window. She looked out the window and scowled. I thought, “I bet she isn’t so proud of us now.”

Mrs. Cook taught us how dirty snow was by melting it and showing us all the dirt in it.

Mrs. Cook sent us home with gladiolus flowers to take to our mothers on mother’s day.

We also made a card for our mothers with an SOS pad.

I remember when Sean Monaghan came to school. He was the new kid, but had been in an accident and was recovering, and that is why he didn’t start when we did.

Lunch tickets were paper and had to be punched. Milk tickets were the same.

You actually could get a straw for your milk.

Using the parachute in gym class.

We also played cowboys and Indians in the gym with Mr. Steffen.

I’m sure I’m forgetting a lot more.

First Grade: Mrs. Bovenmeyer

The first thing we did on the first day of school was color the letter L. It was color by number if memory serves me correctly, and it got colored red.

Hey – who are all these new kids?

Ferocious Fish. Blue Tailed Horse. Runaway Monkey.

Letter People – Tall Teeth and Funny Feet.

Samantha Morris. She didn’t stay with us long. She attended North Linn with me years later.

Jeff Westemeyer as well. He came to North Linn years later and his name was Jeff Pentecost. Not sure why it changed. I think he had a very troubled home life.

Cutting photos out of magazines when we’d do each letter. I remember cutting a refrigerator out for the letter F and Mrs. Bovenmeyer got a kick out of it and said that she knew I was doing my own work. I learned that fridge was short for refrigerator. I never heard it called anything else!

Nap time. Mrs. Bovenmeyer would do these goofy things where it looked like she was kissing her knees.

Hide the checker.

The coat closet after the early kids left – jeesh!

Mrs. Hagie (Is that how it was spelled?) She was our helper. Jeremy DeMuth asked her if she farted dust in the gymnasium during lunch. She wasn’t amused.

We left a note for Mrs. Hagie and went and “played hookie”. Mrs. Bovenmeyer took us to the grocery store (now Wee Willy’s) and bought us little Snicker’s bars. We took the afternoon off and played.

The whole class going to Cato Webb’s home who lived in town. He raised rabbits. He helped build my father’s root cellar and put in a chimney for us so I already knew who he was. He had a lot of rabbits!

Flying kites with Mr. Steffen. Man that was fun.

Using those turtle scooters in gym class.

Was it about this time that we played under those oak trees and used the leaves to build houses? Weren’t we supposed to be a family of moles, or some sort of critters? Oh, it was fun whatever it was. To this day I smell the oak leaves in the fall and remember that.

Film strips. Advance one frame every time you hear the beep.

All of our worksheets had purple print. That’s because they used a mimeograph machine in the office. It had a very distinctive sound as it ran. It had a round drum and sounded like a little engine when running.

Puff the Magic Dragon

The early bus leaving school with the Winthrop and Aurora kids.

Mr. Meyers as our principal, and his bald head. He retired at the end of our first grade year.

Singing the Kookaburra song with Mr. Meyers as he took us up to Winthrop in the old Ford van the school had. Only a handful of us got to ride up with him.

Was this the year that Cindy Conrad was the snowman and knocked a microphone over? Wasn’t Janet Klein Santa? Vague memories. Maybe this was second grade?

Some older kids came and put on a puppet house type show in our classroom.

Dressing up for Halloween and going to Mrs. Sullivan’s room to see if her class could identify us.

Was this the year Craig Johnson from KWWL came to visit us in the gymnasium?

Wasn’t this also the year we would go to the gym and work on telling time with those paper clocks?

Ms. Thiesen telling us a “scary” story and having it involve hearing footsteps. It was Mrs. Bovenmeyer coming to get us from class. It wasn’t very scary, but memorable.

2^nd grade: Mrs. Hogan

Jeremy DeMuth stabbed me in the arm with his pencil. Man that hurt and I could still see that lead in my arm up to a few years ago. It has since faded.

Travis Cook had a pizza party for his birthday. I couldn’t go because I had the chicken pox.

Monaghan and Greg Schmeltzer skipping around the room after the early bus left.

Sean’s mother would substitute and Sean would be a smartass to her!

Pee-Wee wrestling up at Winthrop.

Jennifer Schweitzer’s last year with our class.

Kelly Short threw me down the stairs. They were concrete and that hurt my knees pretty bad.

Either this year or back in first grade, we had a thing in the gym where we all brought green food. I remember my mother made some sort of salad that I didn’t like, but I remember Candy Meier liked it, whatever it was.

We got a new bus. I can’t remember if it was here in 2^nd grade or in third. It was bus #8. I remember being excited about it.

Mr. Zimmerman was the new principle.

Didn’t we learn cursive here in 2^nd grade?

Going upstairs to Ms. Tassler’s room for math (later Mrs. Stafford)

Ms. (or was it Mrs.) Cherry would also be a substitute.

Was this the year we went to the Grout Museum on field trip? I remember the planetarium.

I should probably remember a lot more than I do about second grade, but for some reason, I’ve forgotten a lot.

3^rd grade: Mrs. Blumenshine (Later Mrs. Bisinger).

Brushing our teeth and fluoride.

Janet Klein’s mother would substitute. She was a fun substitute teacher. I remember her spelling bees.

Read all about it.

Using those old Apple computers. Wasn’t there a program where you had to make the guy jump over something by finding the letter on the keyboard?

Was this John Bare’s first year with us? I remember him talking about Dunkerton like Rose Nylund from Golden Girls spoke of St. Olaf. You knew John came from Dunkerton!

Going to Mrs. Bovenmeyers for reading. I remember we had a tornado drill during reading and we told Mrs. Bovenmeyer that it wouldn’t scare us since the sun was out. She said that tornadoes can happen even in the sunshine. Sure enough, on the morning of April 23^rd, 2001, a tornado formed in broad daylight and damaged many homes and businesses (Jensen trucking for one) there in Independence, Iowa.

4^th Grade: Ms. Decker

Having to take showers for gym class. Boy those shower floors were slick.

They had those exercise stations around the school. I last drove by the school a few years ago and you could still see a couple of the stations, but in terrible state of repair. The signs were very faded.

There was one girl in special ed – I think her name was Rachel – she got mad and slammed her plate on a table. It shattered and was as loud as a shotgun. Pieces of it flew everywhere. Everyone got real silent and she got even more upset and cried.

The space shuttle Challenger exploded.

The Indianapolis 500 was rained out.

Hacky Sacks

Chris King and me flipping a video camera off in class.

We went to the restroom one floor about the fourth grade. Adam Hamilton tried throwing me down the stairs. After Kelly Short doing it to me, I wouldn’t let Adam do it. We about came to blows over it.

I remember picking on Donald McIntosh while waiting in line at the bottom of the steps in Ms. Decker’s class. We would kick his feet out from under him. Yes, I was one of those who added to his burdens.

Speaking of burdens, Ms. Thiesen had a lot on her plate. She got pissed off during class, cursed at us, and slammed her piano lid down – not necessarily in that order.

This was the year that we got to monkey around picking out our instruments. Elizabeth Loughren and I had trombone. Monaghan was on saxophone. Keith Weiland was on tuba or sousaphone. I can remember some of the others, but not all that well.

Was this the year that we’d go to the computer room and run those “turtle” programs, or was that the 5^th grade?

Was this the year we took the field trip to Waterloo to see the bakery and newspaper? Maybe that was the fifth grade. Whatever year it was, Adam Hamilton and I got into trouble for flipping the bird to cars on the road.

5^th Grade; Mrs. Higgins

Intramurals. I cannot remember if we did that in 4^th grade or not.

Science class with Mr. Schloss. That space game was fun. Amy Smock was out of school sick and she was our captain. We did pretty good in her absence.

Mr. Schloss taking us over to the buses to measure the windows.

Mr. Schloss teaching us the difference between the speed of sound and the speed of light. Whoever fired that starters pistol off by the school had a surprise when Mr. Gillihan came out wondering what the hell was going on.

Mr. Schloss’s blue camaro.

Mr. Schloss telling us about how our sense of taste and smell would get worse the older we got. He talked about old people drinking sour milk. He also explained why the television sounded louder in the morning after you slept even though you hadn’t touched the volume. It’s because your hearing restores itself over night.

I got into Doctor Who. I got made fun of for it, but oh well, it’s pretty popular now. Guess I was ahead of my time!

Them really dark sunglasses with the goofy designs on them.

Didn’t we do product advertising that year? I remember Lisa Jones do something about flavored hair mousse, or something along those lines.

Didn’t B.J. Bass move to Tennessee this year?

Field trip to the Old Capitol in Iowa City.

First year of band. I really enjoyed it. I remember there was a song called Trade Winds, but I cannot remember if we played that, or if it was the 6^th grade.

Happy Notes from Ms. Thiesen

Catching Mr. Schloss’s fly ball on the last day of school bare handed. Afterwards, Amy Smock gave me hell for “bragging”.

Other memories:

Jay Bonefas, Jason Franck, and I rode Connie Oliphant’s bus.

Cindy Conrad and Sean Monaghan rode Nan’s bus #12

Travis Cook rode bus #6. Some older fellow drove it and had a reputation of being hell on the bus and it breaking down a lot.

Sue Walhart was also a bus driver, but I cannot remember who rode her bus. When I did Pee Wee wrestling, it was her bus that I rode to Winthrop.

There used to be a basketball game every year where the Iowa Hawkeye football players would come and play basketball against some of our teachers. I remember Mr. Schloss always got in on it. It would be held in the evenings and I went to one or two of them.

The janitor who rode the three wheeled bicycle. Donny was it? I remember they did a mural on the wall or something like that and his bicycle was painted on it.

Jennifer Jensen’s father came and showed us ventriloquism. He told us how to say certain words like peanut butter like “kteenut dutter” and how that would fool the ear.

Amy Smock’s parents brought horses to the playground in Quasky.

The morning a fire destroyed the home just south of the Winthrop school. One of the kids went to school and was a grade or two behind us. I heard they had to get out of the house with just the clothes on their backs, and it wasn’t much.

Corey McMurrin skipping school.

One April Fool’s Day, someone took a “For Sale” sign from a home and placed it in the school yard there in Winthrop.

Bobby Steffen (I think that was his last name???) Hee Haw!

Who was that world traveler guy who would come to school and show us film of his travels across the globe?

Didn’t Santa and his elves visit us in the school gymnasium at Quasky?

Bus #5 was my favorite substitute bus. It was probably one of the oldest buses, and it would backfire when it shifted!

Woody would run the bus route sometimes.

Stopping at the railroad tracks in Winthrop with the bus per state law.

Connie Oliphant running over Hepker’s dog with the bus!

Lopata’s fire. We stopped to get the kids and the fire department was there putting the fire out. I can’t remember if the kids went to school that day or not.

Sliding on the ice in the wintertime at Quasky.

I used to play jump rope with the girls there in Quasky. I guess you could say that I liked being around girls early on!

The playground at Quasky also had an extra merry go round on the north side of the school that was a good spot to go to if you wanted to get away from other kids, but don’t stray too far or you’d get in trouble.

I mentioned Samantha Morris and Jeff Westemeyer, but Penny Power and Mike Schrock were other East Buchanan kids who wound up at North Linn. Tonya King was in our class for awhile, but was held back a year. I went to school with her and Chris King’s cousins, Deryl, Sheldon, and Tricia at North Linn. I also had Chad Manson’s father as my gym teacher and football coach at North Linn.

I’ve got a lot of things that I’m sure I am forgetting. I spent 45 minutes each morning and each evening just on the bus ride. I have a lot of memories from that too, but very few would remember those like I do. This list is not meant to be all inclusive. I just thought it would be fun to tiptoe through a few of the memories that I can rattle off of the top of my brain on a beautiful Wednesday afternoon.

 

 

Satan’s New Trick

Satan is always coming up with new ways to condemn man’s soul to Hell. He’s been perfecting his craft for as long as he’s been in charge of this earth.

It seems Satan has a new trick up his sleeve which is working wonders for him right now. He has mixed love and sin together and perverted them in a way only Satan himself could engineer. God condemned homosexuality. It’s right there in the bible. Moses condemned it as well, but it can be said that Moses was just speaking what God told him. Either way, homosexuality has always been considered a sin.

Satan’s new trick involves making the act of homosexuality out to be an act of love and those who oppose it as love’s enemy. Who doesn’t love “love”? He’s succeeding too. It’s becoming more and more acceptable to live in outright sin and it has become very unacceptable to speak out against living in sin. That is Satan’s handiwork for you.

Well, even though the gay community will tell you it’s a bunch of shit, it is possible to love the person, but hate the sin. Jesus never once told anyone to continue to live in sin. Not once. He always forgave the person, and even then, only when they sought forgiveness, and told them to sin no more.

My, how the times have changed. That’s okay. This world is but a test. God put us here in this filthy place to see if we choose good or evil. We have a choice here. When I go before God someday, I will be judged based upon my abhorrence  or acceptance of sin. I am a sinner too. I don’t ask anyone to overlook my sin or to accept my continued sinning without remorse. I ask for prayers to help me overcome. These people living in these homosexual relationships aren’t even remorseful. Many of them probably aren’t even Christians, while there are some who are, and they are trying to change the church to where it accepts sin too. Oh, Satan is a wily one.

Where does it end? I have heard those who embrace this new reality say that by allowing homosexuals to openly marry and live in sin, that nothing changes for me. Maybe that’s true.

If my neighbor beats his dog to death, nothing changes for me either, yet that’s illegal.

If two women want to marry the same man, they cannot. I believe this will be the next frontier in marriage, but that’s for a different time and place to discuss.

There were societies where people practiced human sacrifice. Those being sacrificed were more than willing. We don’t allow that. Even in cases where one elderly spouse asks the other spouse to put them out of their misery, we charge the surviving spouse with murder. That’s a fact Jack. If we use the same argument as we do for accepting gay marriage; “It doesn’t mean that you have to kill your spouse if asked” & “It doesn’t affect you if Biff kills his cancer ridden wife Glenda – it’s a personal matter”. Then why are we prosecuting these people who put their spouses out of their misery then? I’ll tell you why.

This country was founded on Judeo-Christian principles. We are throwing them away and entering into a dangerous lifestyle, not much different than the Roman Empire before Christianity. The one difference is that even in the old Roman Empire, they believed in a higher power. Man is making themselves out to be God in this new order of things, and the government is doing the same.

Have hope though. God said it would get really bad before he returned. They are right, you aren’t required to go out and marry someone from the same sex. But remember, despite what the proponents of this sinful lifestyle would tell you, you do not have to embrace it. You are not in error when you shun sin. Satan wants to make you out to be the enemy and he is doing just that. Hold fast to the faith. People will reject you as they rejected Jesus. It was fortold in the bible. And despite what people tell you, it is possible to love the person but hate the sin.

When you look at how the Muslim world feels about us, just remember this. Most of the Muslim world lives by the Koran. If only we Christians would live by the bible in the same manner. When the Muslims call us the “Great Satan”, this is what they are referring to. They see us as a society that promotes sinfulness and forgets about God. Homosexuality is not tolerated in the Muslim world.

It’s my understanding that the Muslims would rather tolerate a Jew or Christian than an Athiest or Agnostic. Muslims have less respect for someone who denies God than a person who sees God differently than them. Satan is using us as his tool to wipe God from this earth. Satan is full of tricks and is good at his craft. God is better and in the end, will overcome and reclaim this earth. I anxiously await His return.

More Obama Hogwash

            Carney, who in recent weeks has studiously avoided mentioning Snowden by name, let loose from the White House podium on Monday, criticizing the former contractor for the countries he had potentially chosen for refuge.

            "Mr. Snowden's claim that he is focused on supporting transparency, freedom of the press and protection of individual rights and democracy is belied by the protectors he has potentially chosen - China, Russia, Ecuador, as we've seen," Carney said.

"His failures to criticize these regimes suggests that his true motive throughout has been to injure the national security of the United States, not to advance Internet freedom and free speech."

           

            What a bunch of hogwash! This is no different than Obama calling the Boston Bombers “cowards”.  The administration wants to make Snowden look like a liar by pointing out the lack of free speech and press in the countries he chose to seek refuge from the United States.

            I’m sure Snowden would have loved to have chosen a country with more freedom of press and speech, but he is in the position of having the United States government coming after him, so he has limited choices on which countries he can go to that will protect him from long arm of the United States government. Ecuador is certainly better than China, Russia, Cuba, Iran, or North Korea. I still wonder why his Iceland plans fell through…..

            It seems he picked the best countries he could have considering his options. Do you know who would have LOVED to have sheltered Snowden? North Korea. Think of the propaganda they could have generated! Cuba might have sheltered him as well, or even Iran. Why do you think he wants to go to Central America? It’s because he wants the freest country who would shelter him from the United States. Ecuador fits that bill. We have this opinion that the United States is the greatest country on the planet. A lot of other countries like to think they have the greatest too.

            While the United States is one of the more free countries when it comes to intellectual freedom, many other countries are more free when it comes to life in general. Take seat belt laws for example. There are places on this planet who allow you to choose to be a dummy or not. You get fined here for it.

            That may be a piss poor example, but I have spoken to a lot of people in my years driving semi, many who came to America from abroad. Many of them felt they had more personal freedoms back home, but felt America is where the money was at. Many of them told me that the American Dream comes with giving up a lot of personal freedom.

            I did speak to one guy who escaped here from Romania in the 1980’s while it was still under communist rule. He said that he moved to North Dakota to get as far away from centralized government as he possibly could. He told me that he was disturbed by a lot of things happening in the country and that we were moving towards a police state like he lived in. He certainly was an expert on knowing how a police state operated having actually lived and escaped from one. He said the big difference was that we are constantly told that we’re free when we aren’t, so we don’t fight back against our oppressors whereas in Romania, you had no illusion of freedom. I spoke to this guy back in 1998. I wonder how he feels now, especially after 9/11 and the Patriot Act?

            If you get right down to it, the only true freedom you have here in this country is the freedom to think what you want to think, although you are not free to act upon those thoughts and beliefs (George Reynolds vs. United States 98 U.S. (8 Otto.) 145 (1878)), and to write your beliefs down and put them out into the public (again with limitations). That’s about it. Other than that, you don’t really have any other freedoms that other people the majority of other countries in the world lack. There are some countries that are terrible like North Korea, but the majority of countries (Australia, Canada, India, Mexico, etc. etc.) have about the same freedoms for their people that we have. Some other countries may have more.

            Let’s look at “evil” Iran for a moment. Surely they don’t have the same intellectual freedoms we have here, but are we much better? We both have corrupt governments. They have elections, we have elections. Their choice of candidates is limited, as is ours. We claim that their elections are corrupt and back here to home a slew of dead Illinoisans voted for Kennedy in 1960. However, being a Christian in Iran has its serious drawbacks. If Snowden wanted to continue celebrating Christmas out in the open, I can see why he skipped Iran. If you’re a Muslim, things aren’t too bad for you there. They follow religious law. You know where the boundaries are and if you cross them, you know what punishment to expect.

             Here, the laws are convoluted and even the attorneys don’t know how things might turn out. A lot of it will depend on whether or not the judge and/or jury liked the tie you wore to court on a particular day. Here in America, it also depends on what the definition of “is” is. The Supreme Court has a long history of letting certain things slide while banning other things and splitting hairs over it. Even their own rulings leave lawyers and judges scratching their heads. Is it any wonder Snowden doesn’t trust our court system here! Snowden went to the best country he could find while staying out of the grasp of the United States of America. What the hell did you expect him to do?

            Here I’ve gotten off track, but the point is, to have our administration say this sort of crap is to politically spin this in a very sophomoric way. What they need to do is just break down and cry; throw their tantrum; and go back to the drawing board to prevent this from happening in the future.

For the record, I’m not saying I agree or disagree with what Mr. Snowden has done. I’m just saying that I understand why he has chosen to go the route he is going in order to find asylum. The government’s take on it is laughable. They know exactly why he’s going the path he is, and it just pisses them off that he’s getting away with it. That’s all. Why doesn’t Carney just stand up there and admit it without all this extra political spin bullshit?

 

Lisa Marie Durnan February 15th, 1980 – June 22nd, 1983

           It was hot in 1983. I was only 7 but I can still remember that hot sun that summer. I can remember a lot of things from the summer of 1983. It was a summer that would change my life. It changed the life of my family. It made me who I am today.

            I preach to everyone that I wish they’d write family stories down. I myself am guilty of failing to take the time to actually write everything down as well. I do a lot of writing, but it’s so much easier telling the story verbally. The problem is, verbal stories generally fade into the ether of time in a generation or two. So for that reason, I have taken the time to write this painful story down. It is my hope that my sister will be remembered many years from now, even long after I am gone.

            Father’s Day fell on Sunday the 19^th of June in 1983. My mother told me that she took my father out for a nice Father’s Day supper that night and that we had a babysitter. I don’t remember that, but I do remember my parents using babysitters and going out while we lived at the Red House there at Rowley. I do remember playing outside that weekend with other children. My memory says that Jean and Dale were down, and that Little Dale Robinson had his family there. If they were, it had to have been on Saturday the 18^th. I could be confusing my memories with another time, but this is what I remember. The one clear memory I have was taking a branch from a tree that had broken off from the wind, and chasing kids around with it. Isn’t it funny how we can remember little details like that sometime and totally forget large ones like having a baby sitter? Mom says she remembers my sister Lisa being fussy that evening and not wanting her and Dad to leave. She thought it was just because Lisa didn’t want watched by a baby sitter, but now she wonders if it wasn’t because she was getting sick.

            On the morning of the 20^th, I remember it was sunny. It was a very hot and sunny day. I was sitting at the table in the dining room, and I remember Lisa standing there, not feeling well. She threw up this white colored crap and my parents decided she needed to see a doctor.

            My parents were not ones to utilize doctors often. Mom would take the “baling wire and twine” approach to doctoring us up at home, and Dad didn’t like us seeing doctors very often because he was, let’s say – frugal; very frugal.

            Mom called Doc McCollough in Walker there. Barney McCoullough was a physician’s assistant and had that office there on the southwest side of Walker. I think Wendy Hocken lives there now. Back then, Barney had a pretty good business there and there was even a pharmacy next door.

            Lisa had just had her immunizations not too long beforehand. Mom to this day wonders if she didn’t get a bad batch. But on this day, Barney looked Lisa over and said she must have the flu. Take her home and let her get plenty of rest.

            Well, that’s just what my parents did. Some people have given Barney a lot of flack over this and many said that he should have been burned at the stake for what happened, but the truth is, Barney had no reason to suspect anything more serious as Meningitis shows all the symptoms of the flu. A stiff neck would have been the only extra indicator and Mom said she doesn’t remember Lisa complaining of her neck being stiff. Barney beat himself up something fierce after this happened. Barney took it very personally and I know for a fact it wasn’t easy for him to go on after my sister died. My parents could have sued Barney, but they didn’t. It wasn’t going to bring Lisa back and it wasn’t like Barney was out there killing people by being negligent.

            Now, you have to understand the way our family operated at this time. My father was a railroad engineer and was working out of Clinton, Iowa while we lived at Rowley. This was because the railroad bounced my father around from town to town every so often like the military supposedly does, and so my parents bought a home midway between all the towns my father worked.

            Dad did a pretty good stint in Clinton. He had a small apartment there where he stayed during the week, and then he’d come home for his days off. We didn’t see a lot of Dad during this time. Mom wanted us to either sell the house and move to Clinton with him or rent the place out and move with him there in Clinton. Mom says Dad wouldn’t hear of it and this became something she held against him for the rest of their marriage.

            Dad was home on his weekend and had to go back to Clinton. While he was home, he scheduled an exhaust job up at Boubin’s in Independence. He had to get going, so he layed Lisa down in his and Mom’s bed. I remember they had these blue sheets on their bed. He turned the little desktop oscillating fan onto her and let her get her rest. It was the last time anyone saw Lisa with her eyes open and alive.

            Dad left for Boubin’s. Like I’ve said before, it was terribly hot out. We didn’t have air conditioning at that home. It was a cement block house and the sun would warm those blocks and the house would hold heat. The only way to escape it was to go outside and sit under a tree. The only saving grace of that property when it came to heat was that it sat on a hill and the wind always seemed to blow up there.

            I don’t know exactly what time it was, but it was not too long after Dad left, but I happened to go through my parent’s bedroom. In there, I found my sister in respiratory distress. I was only 7 years old, but I knew something was seriously wrong. Lisa’s chest was heaving and she was gasping for air.

            I went out and told my mother what I saw and Mom chewed me out, telling me to leave Lisa alone. Mom claims this did not happen, but it did. I remember looking at the orange rotary phone hanging on the wall there in the kitchen and thinking about calling the operator.

            Yes, the operator. This was when we still had a party line and there wasn’t any 911. This was before 911 addresses. When you had an emergency, you called the operator who connected you with fire, police, or ambulance services. It was either that or you had a list of the phone numbers for the different services next to the phone.

            Now, my mother was in the middle of doing dishes. That much we can agree on. It was hot out. I mean it was scorching hot out! She had her hands in hot water, I don’t suppose us children were behaving the greatest from the heat, and she had a sick kid. Dad was getting ready to go on the road again and that always bothered my mother. I can understand her being in a foul mood.

            However, it is my recollection that she told me to leave my sister alone and go play. She says she didn’t snap at me, but stopped doing the dishes and went and checked on Lisa right away. Now mind you, I wouldn’t have wanted to pick up that phone and call if my mother had went and checked on her immediately. Either way, we both agree that at this point, it was probably beyond the point of no return. She would have had to have been admitted earlier that morning and even then, we may have lost her. It is what it is.

            Either way, after awhile, my mother went and checked on my sister. I know this for a fact. I was sitting at the table in the dining room when this next part happened. As long as I live, I will never forget the sight of my mother coming out of her bedroom with Lisa in her arms, trying to blow breath into her body while going to the phone. My mother was in full terror mode.

            Now, where I was when Mom made the phone call I cannot remember. I do remember going upstairs and watching the rest of this unfold. We had an open staircase and I layed up top there peeking my head down watching things between the rungs.

            My mother called Susie Brentener. Susie lived just to the south of us and was Steve and Hal Brentener’s daughter. She was much older than me, but rode the same bus. She used to babysit us and Mom thinks she is the one who babysat us the night before. Mom knew that Susie Brentener knew how to perform CPR. As it so happened, Hal and Susie were on their way out the door to go buy groceries when Mom got ahold of them. Just one minute later and Mom would have missed them. They quickly arrived at the house as they only lived a mile or two away. Mom obviously called the ambulance too as they came a little while after Hal and Susie.

            I remember watching my sister lay there on the red carpet of our front room looking lifeless. I remember watching Susie performing CPR on my sister. Even to this day it is very difficult for me to remember this. Just recalling it makes my heart hurt, especially when I think of my own children. That’s something nobody needs to witness. I’m sure Susie never thought she’d ever put her CPR to use like that on a little girl. I wonder if she still thinks about that day and how it has affected her life?

            Lisa lay there just inside the front door that we never used. We always used the back door, but this was different. The front door was closest to the road. We always knew when strangers came visiting as they always knocked on the front door. This time the door was open waiting for the ambulance.

            The ambulance came and I cannot recall if they took over CPR there or not. I’m sure they had to. I don’t remember the next few minutes as they loaded Lisa up and took her away. I just know they pulled into the yard in the grass and backed up to the front door. Then she was gone.

            I don’t know if Susie stayed, but I know Hal stayed with us. Mom left with Lisa in the ambulance. I could tell that Hal was very disturbed. This was before cell phones and we had no way of getting hold of my father other than to call Boubin’s. They said he had left already and was on his way home. I do remember Hal pacing around outside at the end of our drive. Like I said, she was very disturbed and just kept pacing and looking to the north towards Independence.

            I remember my father finally showing up and Hal waving at him to get his attention. He just barely pulled in and she ran to my father’s window and I could see her emphatically gesturing. Dad spun the car around there in the driveway and he squealed the tires as he left. I have never seen my father drive like that before. He headed back to Independence where they had taken Lisa.

            Now at this point in the story, I will rely upon what my parents and others have told me, as well as my own recollections. I was not at the hospital, but stayed there to home. I believe Dad’s sister Marie came to stay with us. Maybe it was Veronica, but I’m almost positive it was Marie. Either way, it was one of Dad’s youngest sisters who came to stay with us.

            They took my sister to Independence where Doc Mayner took a look at Lisa and called in the Life Flight helicopter. The chopper came and they took Lisa to the University of Iowa Children’s Hospital. I remember seeing my Aunt Kate come to the house and Mom said that was because they wanted to take Joni in for observation since she was only 14 months old. She said that Kate took her to St. Lukes in Cedar Rapids for observation. Mom and Dad went to Iowa City and Lisa was put on life support. They did not know what was wrong with her at this point. So ends the events of the 20^th of June, 1983.

            I don’t recall much about the 21^st of June other than our neighbor brought us lunch. Our neighbors to the north were Roger and Sharon Nelson. My father spoke quite disparagingly about the Nelsons. I’m not sure why, but I know he didn’t like the hog operation that they had to the west of our property. We had a 5 acre parcel and they owned the land to the north and west of us. Harold Kress owned a small hog operation to the south of us. We were located on the west side of the road. At that time, nobody lived to our east across the road. Since then, they moved the church that used to sit a few miles south up to across the road, and slightly south. But back in 1983, it was just Roger Nelson to our north and west and Harold Kress to our south.

            Dad complained about the smell of the hog operation and I believe he even attempted to sue them over it. I was just a young kid, but I remember things weren’t so great as neighbors between us, or at least that was our take on it. They probably didn’t know Dad was upset until they were contacted by an attorney. I don’t know. It was what it was. But anyhow, on the 21^st of June, Sharon Nelson brought over a picnic basket filled with food. Here’s where all the information I just gave you plays into this. I didn’t know if it was safe to eat this food or not! This was like Snow White accepting an apple from the old miserly witch. Mom and Dad made the Nelsons out to be bad people and here they had brought over a picnic basket of food. I don’t remember exactly what was in that basket, but I believe it was fried chicken. I also remember sweet corn being in there, and it was very delicious. I remember thinking that nobody who could cook so well and be so thoughtful could be so evil. I’m sure the Nelsons were fine people. I love my father, but sometimes his main-springs are wound a little too tight.

            I had chores to do during this time in my life. I had a handful of rabbits to take care of. I remember that someone came and helped do the rest of the chores. I don’t know if it was Uncle Mark, or just who it was. I remember watching them milk our cow and it just felt weird seeing someone else do the job. It’s sort of like seeing someone else wear your clothes. It’s a feeling of having something very familiar and yet very strange at the same time. Our place was starting to seem like an airport. People were coming and going quite a bit now. Mom and Dad were gone and it was difficult for me at age 7 having all of this taking place. I just wanted “normal” to return. Little did I know that what was normal up to this point would never be the normal for us ever again. We were about to embark on a new path of a “new normal”.

            Back in Iowa City. They had done a spinal tap on my sister and discovered it was meningitis. At this point in time, there wasn’t much that could be done. Meningitis is an inflammation of the lining around the brain. It can be either viral or bacterial. Lisa’s was bacterial. Many of us carry the bacteria which causes meningitis in the back of our noses. Why it enters the bloodstream and infects some people is still sort of mysterious. When the lining around the brain swells up, it cuts off blood to the brain and kills you.

            June 22^nd, 1983. It was hot. It had been hot for a few days at this point. One thing I will remember about the summer of 1983 is the relentless sun and the constant heat. It didn’t help that we didn’t have air conditioning and that we lived in that block house. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. It was hot!

            Dad came home on the morning of the 22^nd. I think he came home to check on us and stuff around the house. This much I can tell you. While he was home, a phone call came in from the hospital. I remember this very well. There was a chair in the kitchen between the fridge and the sink. It was facing the dining room. We never kept a chair in the kitchen, but I suppose one was there for the purpose of these phone calls. Dad was sitting down and I was sitting on his lap facing him. He was facing the living room and I was facing the breezeway. I remember Dad started crying. He cried in a way that I have never seen before or since. In fact, I thought he was faking it. He wasn’t.

            Mom had called. They did a brainwave test on Lisa and she was brain dead. They wanted her off of the life support right then and there. Back then, before I-380 went all the way through Cedar Rapids and up to Waterloo like it does now, one had to travel down what is now Center Point Road and then through Cedar Rapids to get onto I-380 in order to go to Iowa City. It was going to take Dad about 2 hours to get back to the hospital. Iowa City still insisted that Lisa be removed immediately. From what I was told, Uncle Mike Durnan and his wife Bonnie were there and Mom said Uncle Mike got up and told the doctor that they were going to wait for my father to get back down there. Mike is a big man. They got the point, but the doctors told Mom that they were going to go and get a court order to have Lisa removed and Mother told them to go get it.

            Dad headed back down to Iowa City. At home, I didn’t know what was going on down there. I think my father shielded me from the news at this point. Mom sat there in Lisa’s room with her on life support knowing that very soon Lisa would be dead. Mom said she fixed Lisa’s hair all pretty like Lisa liked and painted her finger and toenails. Mom said she kept running her fingers through Lisa’s hair.

            Lisa had not been baptized at this point as my parents weren’t all that religious. Lisa was baptized there in the hospital by the Catholic chaplain before they took her off of life support.

            When Dad returned, they took Lisa off of life support and handed her to my father. He was in a rocking chair and sat there rocking her. Mom kept running her fingers through Lisa’s hair and rubbing her back. Lisa gasped for air and her body went limp. She died in my father’s arms.

            What do you do when your daughter dies? Life changes, that is for sure. My parents have blurry recollections at this point, and I can certainly understand why. Mom did say that they told her they would give her a tranquilizer and that when Lisa died, they came and gave Mom the shot and she said it was like Marlin Perkins had shot her with an elephant tranquilizer gun. She said it was quite potent.

            Mom says it was so potent that she cannot remember who drove her home. She had to stop by St. Luke’s to pick up my sister Joni. She got there and here Joni was missing. Joni had escaped her bed and was standing in the 6^th floor window of the hospital looking out it. Now, was Joni in any real danger since hospital windows are sealed? Probably not, but the fact is, they weren’t watching Joni very well and here Mom had just lost one daughter and another one was MIA in St. Lukes.

            Mom says she didn’t even wait to change Joni out of her hospital pajamas. She grabbed Joni and headed for home. I can’t say as I blame her.

            Somewhere about this time, they made anyone who was in contact with Lisa take an antibiotic. It wasn’t just any antibiotic. It was a special one geared towards meningitis. I do not know the name of it, but I will never forget what it did to us. It turned us orange. Our skin turned orange. I peed orange. Our sweat was orange. Our eyes got an orange tint to them. Just like those people who take colloidal silver turn blue, we did the same in the color of orange.

            I wouldn’t swallow pills at that age, so they took the pill and put it in ice cream for me. It turned my ice cream orange. I cannot tell you if it tasted bad or not. It was hot that summer and I never turned ice cream down, even if it was orange. I still wish I remember which aunt stayed with us. I still think it was Marie and God bless her as she had to put up with me and my mouthiness. I refused to take my medicine until they figured out that ice cream trick. (I have since learned it was in fact Aunt Marie, God bless her!)

            Our home really became Grand Central Station at this time. We had all sorts of family there at the house helping out. My parents had a funeral to plan. They turned to White Funeral Home in Independence which is the funeral home that my family has used for many, many years.  

           Mom insisted that Lisa not be buried. Mom could not stand the thought of putting dirt on top of her daughter. To hear Mom tell it, Dad complained about the cost of putting Lisa in a mausoleum and Mom said that she didn’t care. She said if anyone threw dirt on Lisa that she would shoot them dead. Mom said the White boys said that they would have her arrested for threatening and Mom says she told them to go ahead, but that she would eventually get out and come hunt them down and shoot them dead. She told my father the same thing. My mother understandably took Lisa’s death very hard. I think losing a child is one of the worst things I have seen a human being endure.

            They found a cemetery in Waterloo where Lisa could be placed in a mausoleum vs. being buried. Lisa was to be interred at Mt. Olivet Catholic Cemetery there by the intersection of Highway 63 and US 20. People in the mausoleum are placed two per square in the wall. One will be placed on the inside of the building and another on the outside part of the wall. Mom didn’t want a stranger in the same hole as Lisa so they purchased both spots in the wall.

            While they were planning the funeral, I remember Aunt Mary Turner and her husband Kenny came to spend some time with us. I remember Mary taking my cousin Jeremy and me up to the funeral home in her green Chevy pickup with the topper on the back. She drove up through Quasky and was going to head for Winthrop to get to Independence. The Diagonal used to be gravel and had just recently been paved at this time. Mary wasn’t sure where the Diagonal lead to so she was going to take the way she knew. We told her to take the Diagonal and she told us in jest that if we got her lost, we would be in trouble. Mary took us up to the funeral home, but I remember she also took Jeremy and me out for ice cream at the Dairy Queen.

            Once back home, I was supposed to take a bath. I refused to take one for some reason and Kenny Turner lost patience with me. He took me by the arm and made me take a bath. I don’t blame him. I was most likely being an ass. I was only 7 years old and this was pretty tough for me too.

            I remember going to the wake. I remember the funeral better. Mrs. Bovenmeyer, my first grade teacher was there. She came up and gave me a hug and a kiss. God bless her! She was one of the sweetest teachers that anyone could ever have. Reverend Bill Arms from the church in Quasky came and was part of the service. I remember kids from the church there singing at the funeral. I remember we had standing room only when it came to Lisa’s funeral. It was very well attended.

            When the funeral was over, everyone was heading out to their cars to go to the cemetery. Again, it was very hot outside! 1983 was a scorcher. I was with my parents when they closed the coffin. I saw my parents give Lisa a kiss on the head before they closed the lid. I chose to give her a kiss on the forehead as well. I’m glad I did. I never did cry at Lisa’s funeral. I felt bad about that for years, but again, I was only 7.

            When we left, I rode in the white hearse with my parents. Mary and Kenny had our car and drove it for us. The one thing I remember about being in the hearse was the air conditioning. It was ice cold! I was not used to that. My parents car didn’t have working air conditioning. It was a nice chilly ride from Independence to the west side of Waterloo.

            I can still remember the police at all the intersections between Independence and the cemetery stopping traffic. They had their hats off in a sign of respect. We never stopped from the time we left Independence until we got to the cemetery. I remember them saying our funeral procession was over 2 miles long.

            Once we got to the cemetery, we got out of the car. My father was to be a pall bearer at this point when we took Lisa inside the mausoleum to place her in the wall. Dad asked if I wanted to go with him or stay with Mom. I opted to go with Dad. I held Dad’s hand while we took Lisa into the mausoleum. I remember the hole in the wall was open. I remember seeing little ball bearings inside the hole. I thought that was odd, but now I understand they were in there to help slide the casket in.

            I remember Aunt Bonnie the most there at the mausoleum. She was crying something fierce and I have never seen her tore up so bad. God bless Bonnie. She had a soft heart. They ratcheted Lisa up in the air and slid her into the wall. Even though we placed her in the wall from the inside of the mausoleum, her plaque is on the outside of the building. That was it. I don’t remember much after that. I know we went somewhere and had a luncheon afterwards. I think it was back at the funeral home.

            How do you go back to living life after something like this? My parents had to go back to living their life even though it had been drastically changed forever. My parents dealt with it very differently. Dad clammed up and Mom did strange things. My father became less and less jovial and became irritated much easier after Lisa’s death.

            I remember Lisa’s first birthday after she died. Mom baked a cake for Lisa but wouldn’t let us eat it. She said if Lisa wasn’t there to enjoy it, then neither would we. She took it up to the nursing home and let the elderly people eat it.

            One thing is for sure, I saw what it did to someone having to lose somebody close to them without having the chance to say goodbye. You learn not to take people for granted anymore. You also have a constant realization that anyone can be gone in a snap of the fingers. People who lose loved ones suddenly like this seem to have an understanding that those who haven’t lost someone this way lack. Losing someone suddenly changes you in a way that you cannot imagine. You sadly have to live it to understand it.

            I think Lisa’s death was the start of my parents’ divorce less than 8 years later. If my parents were having problems in their marriage in early 1983, Lisa’s death only exacerbated them. When I look back at my childhood, I look at it as those years before Lisa died and those years after she died. I had two sets of parents. There were the ones I had before Lisa died and those after. The ones before were warm and loving. The ones after were cold and distant.

            It affected me in the following ways. I felt guilty for not calling the operator for a long time afterwards. I learned that people can be taken away from you in a snap of the fingers. I became closer to God after Lisa’s death. I started attending church there in Quasky. I would go on my own and Mom would sit down at the Big Q. I still have the red bible that Lois Murray gave me in 1986. Once we moved to Walker, I quit going to church, but always felt a relationship with God.

            When I was 18, I was working at Iowa Ham in Independence. I worked the graveyard shift and I remember one afternoon having a vivid dream with my sister Lisa in it. She came and told me that everything was okay. She told me that I would have a daughter and that I would name her Lisa Marie as well. Wouldn’t you know, 3 years later I did indeed have a daughter and of course, her name was Lisa Marie Durnan after my sister.

            I want to take the time here to tell you a little about my sister. She will never have the opportunity to have children or grandchildren of her own who might otherwise write about her. As her brother, I feel a duty to preserve her memory. She certainly deserves it.

            Lisa was born February 15^th, 1980 at Oelwein, Iowa. She was born a “Blue” baby, with her umbilical cord around her neck. Thankfully, she survived that. She was only 14 months younger than my brother Casey. The two of them were pretty tight. She was my eldest sister, the third child of my parents, Bernard Luke and Teresa Ann Kane Durnan.

            Lisa was a very smart child. She did everything early. She was the type of kid who didn’t take guff from anyone. If we picked on her, she would wait until we were taking a nap and then she would come and pound the piss out of us. I remember her getting mad at me and throwing sand in my eyes one time. Boy that made me angry. I couldn’t see for awhile and my mother had to hold me under some running water to clear my eyes.

            Lisa liked “pretty” things. She loved her dolls. She was a lovable girl. She liked to play doctor and come check you out to see if you had a fever. She would take and open your eyes wide like a doctor and check you out. Dad would nickname her Doc Lisa sometimes.

            Lisa loved the Smurfs. Her last Christmas she got a lot of Smurf items. She referred to the Smurfs as “Murfs”. Another unique speech item for Lisa was that she used the word “foof” for “move”. If she wanted you to move over, she’d tell you to “foof” over. Even to this day my family uses the word “foof” for the word move. That’s a Lisa-ism.

            I remember one time we were going to see Aunt Diane. This was before the seat belt law in 1986. We were in the back of the car and Lisa was standing up in the back of the car leaning over the front of the seat. She was falling asleep and her legs were giving out under her. Her butt would start to droop down and it would wake her up just enough that she would stand back up and then the process would repeat. Casey and I got to laughing pretty good about that one. It entertained us for many miles.

            I have stopped from time to time up there at the cemetery where Lisa is interred. I haven’t been there since 2009 due to health. When I drove truck, I would go by on Highway 20 and you can look right up there to where she is. I would often toot my horn for her. I think of her often.

            I normally don’t like it when people say, “So and so is up in heaven looking down on us right now!” How do you know "so and so" made it to Heaven? You might be surprised. However, in Lisa’s case, I have no problem using the word Heaven. I do not believe for one minute that God would condemn an innocent little girl to Hell. I have always felt that God is a jealous God and likes to keep the best for himself. Maybe he took Lisa before she had a chance to become a sinner? I guess I’ll know the answer when I finally see God for myself. It’s one of the mysteries that I want to ask God about.

            I wrote this in Memoriam of the 30^th Anniversary of Lisa’s “Heaven Day”.

                                   

                                                                                                                        Her Brother,

                                                                                                                        Eric E. Durnan