Brownie

     I have three vehicles that I currently own. Last year, after I discovered my wife's affair, I sold the two vehicles that we owned. I had two nice Chrysler minivans. One was a 1997 and the other was a beautiful 2002 with low miles. I just couldn't ride in vehicles where I knew my wife had been with another man repeatedly. I had just gotten done sticking over $2000 in the 1997 so that it was almost like a new van. It made me sick to sell them, but thinking about what went on in those vehicles made me sicker. For the 2002, I traded it for a 1990 Chevy 4X4 pickup (named Charlie) and a 1982 Chevy full size conversion van that we named "Brownie". The pickup was rough, but the Chevy van was in pretty good shape for the age. Actually, it was in better than good shape; it was near mint. That may not be saying much to those who shudder at the thought of a big brown full sized van as opposed to a sports car or sporty pickup, but to me, a van aficionado, it meant a lot. This van was in such good shape, that it appeared it had hardly been used. There was no sun fading, fabric fading, paint fading, cracking or peeling. It was rust free. It didn't have any rust on the body or the frame. The steering wheel wasn't worn anywhere. Everything in the van was tight, like it was fairly new. This van looked like it dropped out of 1985 or 1986. The engine ran like it was new. It's a 305 High Output with a 4 barrel carburetor. I was leery at first because old carburetors are notorious for leaking and just plain being screwed up. They aren't cheap to repair anymore either! I hit the key on this van and the engine came to life without even touching the gas pedal. The 305 purred. It ran so smooth and quiet. You could hardly hear it run. I drove it. It ran just like it would have back in the mid eighties. I couldn't believe it! It was like this van came out of a museum or something. I like old things. I still listen to my music on vinyl. I go to cemeteries for fun. I like old houses. I like old furniture. I like old people for that matter too. This van was old and in very good shape. I fell in love. I have tried to describe this van to my friends and I have gotten used to their yawning about it. To them, it's an old brown van. To me, it's living history. When I can hop in this van and hit the key without touching the gas pedal, it's a beautiful thing to me. When I hear the thing run quiet like it would have from the factory, it's music to my ears. When I smell that old gassy exhaust that those vans put out (think of the old gasoline bus exhaust smell from childhood), it's delightful to my nose. It's about the same to me as watching steam locomotives running down the rails today. People come out of the woodwork and stand by the rail sidings snapping pictures of these locomotives when they are out running on display. That's the brown van for me. While my old Chevy van isn't quite the relic that a locomotive is, it is getting rarer to find such a specimen. Go try finding yourself a four door car from the muscle car era. It's near impossible. Back then, everyone kept the two door models because they were desirable while throwing the four door models into the iron pile. Someday, in the not too distant future, you'll play hell finding these old classic vans that many of our families owned back in the day. If you do, they'll be all beat to hell or modified to such a point that they won't resemble the vans that our parents owned. The old Chevy van that I own is just like it came from the dealership. It isn't modified at all. It's like stepping back in time.

Brownie (1982 Chevrolet G20)

     All of this doesn't mean that the old girl doesn't have her problems. Like those old locomotives that I mentioned, there is a lot of maintenance that goes into this van. We found out from the original owners that this van was only used to go on vacation. It was never a daily driver. It would go months without ever being driven. It was always stored as well, which explains it's immaculate condition. However, time still works on things. It makes things brittle. The speedometer went out shortly after buying it. The tires were dry rotted. The hoses were dry rotted. Anything that was rubber was in pretty poor shape with the exception of the door and window seals. The spring for the latch in the door was brittle and snapped as well. The blower motor switch for the heater is temperamental. I suppose all of those years sitting around wasn't good for it. I'll probably give it the old WD-40 treatment to see if it cures it.

     Last fall, I took the van to Waterloo to see my grandfather. While there, a tire went flat. I thought that we might have ran something over. As it turns out, the tire just split around the bead because of dry rot. I threw a spare on and parked it because I didn't want to drive it in the winter anyhow. I'd go out and start it from time to time all winter long. This spring, I didn't have the money to fix the van up. It just sat outside; that is, until recently. That old 1990 Chevy pickup is getting to be a pain in my ass. I'm just plain sick of it. I want a van back so that way we can all travel somewhere as a family together instead of taking two pickup trucks. I've started the process of replacing all of the old dry rotted rubber. After sitting outside all winter, the fuel pump went bad. Not that it went bad mechanically. It still pumped fuel. The diaphram inside rotted and it pumped gasoline into the crank case. The top radiator hose sprung a leak. The power steering pump is now leaking as well. I'm repairing all of these things so that the old van can be back on the road. I'm going to drive it too. I can't afford to have it sitting around anymore. I need to put it into service. Sadly, it too will start to wear and rust just like all the rest. The only difference is that it will do so almost two decades after it's brethren and I will have the pleasure of driving and caring for a vehicle that my parents would have owned.