Let’s see, 7 years ago I would have been 32 years old. Since then, I’ve lived a lot of life. As with most people, my thoughts on some things have changed. I wasn’t really into family history as deep back then. My father in law was still alive. I wrote a piece stating that I only wanted to live long enough, then die before I got too old and lonely. You can read about it here: http://ericdurnan.blogspot.com/2008/03/live-just-long-enough-and-prosper.html
I pointed to my maternal grandmother who was only 67 years old when she died. I spoke of how she was lucky that she never had to bury any of her children or watch her siblings die. I hereby take back those words. Life experiences have changed my mind on the matter. Since then, my health has gotten far worse and there have been a couple of instances where I felt near death. I learned rather unequivocally that I wanted to keep living. I thought of my children living life without me. My youngest is now 8 years old, but even the thought of another 15 years on this earth seems too short. In fifteen years, I’ll be about 55 years old. Think of how much life I would be giving up if I died then! My grandfather, whom I mentioned in the original piece, died 5 years later. If I hadn’t of had those 5 years, I would have missed out on some very special bonding with him. I have learned that even though your peers may be dead, you are still worth something to the younger generation. It’s worth sticking around and seeing what happens.
If I live to be 67, the age that my grandmother died at, I would live until the year 2043. By contrast, if I live to be 90 years old, I will live until the year 2066. That’s a 23 year difference. That’s enough time to see a grandchild go from being born to being a 23 year old. Think of how much influence I could have in the life of that young soul! If that grandchild lives to be 90 years old, then I’ll be remembered by someone on this earth until the year 2133! Fancy that! They say you’re not truly dead until the last person who remembers you dies. Those extra 23 years on this earth are worth it.
I have a new philosophy about life. I think of life in 30 year blocks. The first thirty years should be for building your life. This includes getting your education, picking a profession, getting married, and starting your family. The second 30 years should be spent living your life. These are the years where you take what you built in your first thirty years and care for it, and expand it. These seem to be a person’s prime years. These are the years that you invest in your family. These are the years where the older generation starts passing on and the younger generation is being raised. This is where your family is a blend of old and new, but gradually becomes more new than old.
The last 30 years of one’s life, from age 60 through 90 ought to be spent winding down, tying up loose ends, and preparing to leave a legacy behind. These should be the years where you plan on retiring, paying off your mortgage, and taking some vacations. The older generations in your family are for the most part gone and there are more young ones being born to your children and grandchildren than you can keep up with. You should be a wise sage and offer advice to the younger generations if they ask. You should be there to help your children out with their families if they need it. Invest in your grandchildren as their parents are probably too busy to spend as much time as you can with them. I think the bond between a grandparent and grandchild is a very special one.
Anything over 90 seems to be gravy, however, it has been my experience that those who get over 90 years old lose touch with the youngest in their family. My grandfather lost track of how many great, and great-great grandchildren he had. However, that’s not to say that he didn’t serve a purpose in life after 90. He was still there for me, his grandchild. I loved my grandfather very much and those last few years of his life were very special to me.
So, starting this year, I have started praying to God that I live to at least be 90. That is my prayer. I’m not even half way there yet.
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