Thursday, December 31, 2015

My 2015 in Review


Well, it’s the end of the year. It’s time for my review of the year that was, as it pertained to me and my family.

2015 was a very rough year for this family, as it was for many of those this family knows. That’s not to say that it was rotten for everyone, but it was for far more than it has been in the past few years.

First, one year ago today, I fell on my bathroom floor and boogered my knees up terribly. That hobbled me up pretty bad. Sometime around February, I got a terrible infection in my right lower leg. My leg turned bright red, and the redness started going up my leg. It was hot to the touch and very painful. It made me feel very sick and I had a high fever. The doctors tried a couple of antibiotics, but in the end, I had to take Levaquin to knock it out. Levaquin is a very nasty antibiotic and it nearly knocked me out. I wonder if the Levaquin didn’t set me up for the next problem that I had……

While on Levaquin, I started having terrible bouts with depression. We also had vehicle failures, financial uncertainties, and other stressors which led my doctor to prescribing alprazolam (Xanax) to me on a full time basis. Up to this point, I had a prescription for it, but only took a tablet here or there as needed. Taking the medication full time at first seemed like a good idea, but come July 16th, I thought I had a heart attack. It seems it was a panic attack brought on by my body getting used to the dosage. Xanax is a short acting drug meaning it’s effects on the body are short lived. It is also a drug belonging to the benzodiazepine class of medications. These are the same drugs that are used before you go into surgery to relax you and to make you forget things. In the hands of skilled anesthetists,  it’s a wonder drug, but I found out that it can also become a nightmare when taken for any length of time.

My doctor wanted me to take more alprazolam, but I figured that any drug that can make you feel like you’re having a heart attack in between doses is a terrible drug, far worse than even nicotine. I quit smoking because I didn’t want to be addicted to something, so it shouldn’t be any surprise that I wanted off of the alprazolam too. I essentially went cold turkey off of the medicine, which I found out after-the-fact, is a very bad idea! I suffered horrendous withdrawal symptoms which confined me to my bed for nearly 6 weeks. I still feel symptoms of withdrawal as I write this, four and one half months after my last dose. I have read many places from many other people who have been down this road that I can expect to experience withdrawal problems for up to two years after my last dose! Some people get better sooner, and a few people never really get over it. I find it hard to believe that I little drug like that can mess someone up so bad until I think about LSD. How many hippies have we heard about who “fried” their brains on LSD? Supposedly, many of them went into our mental institutions and some are still walking our streets, suffering flashbacks and other terrible side effects, decades after last taking the drug. It really testifies to how delicate our brain is.

We didn’t put in a garden this year. We did plant a couple of trees. We did get some firewood cut, but not as much as we had liked. Our vehicles gave us a lot of fits this year. First, the van’s water pump gave out. The bill to fix that was over $600. Some good Samaritan picked up the tab for that anonymously. Then the heater hoses under the van rusted through not once, but twice. The guy who originally worked on the van for us really screwed us over. He did a half-assed job and charged us dealership rates for his labor. The second time we just fixed it ourselves, on the side of the road. The pickup also had fits. First, we thought it was the fuel pump. An old friend of mine and his wife came over and helped KinDee change the fuel pump. It still was not running right, so we changed an expensive fuel pressure regulator, and that cured the problem. Oh, I almost forgot, the power steering pump failed on the pickup this year and my wife had to change it all on her own! That was a real treat and required us to spend a small fortune for parts and tools. AND, another one I almost forgot involved the brakes on the van which needed replaced, cleaned, as well as the van needing two new shocks. Again, an old friend of mine arranged for someone to do the labor for us, thank God! In all, over $2000 got stuck into our vehicles this year, but thankfully, a portion of that was mitigated by the kindness of others.

I am only homeschooling Jenna at the moment. I sent Sean and Karen back to school, not because I couldn’t hack homeschooling, but because of my poor health. I miss homeschooling the two younger kids, but I must admit, that I just didn’t have the energy for it after I got ill this past spring. I have a pretty good relationship with our new principal at this school. While I still abhor what we have done to our school by making it a K-8 and sending our high school kids to West Union, at least we have a top notch principal. For that, I’m quite thankful.

Now, for the hardest part of the year. 2015 brought some losses to our family. First, another old friend of mine lost his young son to cancer. That took a toll on this family. I watched my sister Lisa die and losing one of my own children has been a terrible nightmare of mine. Watching my old friend go through it brought back a lot of pain and hurt, as well as fear for me. As his family was going through the pain, I was reliving the pain here on top of it all. We also lost Cousin Ann Durnan totally unexpectedly this March. While Ann and I had our disagreements, I still loved her and I never wanted to see anything like that happen to her. Ann, along with her sister Grace, help take care of my Uncle Mike, who in many ways is like a father to me. I hated seeing Grace and Mike lose someone else so close to them in less than ten years. First it was Bonnie in 2006, Dave in 2009, and then Ann this year. My family was very close to Mike and Bonnie’s, so we felt that loss pretty hard as well. On top of this, several people I know lost loved ones. A few family members, myself included, have failing health this year. As I write this, I have an aunt who has been on hospice, in what is most likely the very end of her life. It’s been a tough, tough year for losses.

On the bright side, it’s also been a year that God has shined through friends and strangers. As I said, someone anonymously paid to have our van fixed with the water pump. KinDee and I have been blessed by an old friend of mine who has helped with fixing vehicles, to several other things that have helped us. There have been other areas where complete strangers have brought sunshine into an otherwise dreary year.

I am probably forgetting a ton of things on here. Regardless, I pray that 2016 is a much better year. The past couple of years have been tough and it would be nice to catch a break!

 

Tuesday, December 8, 2015

Eric’s Parable of The Evil Son

There was a family of thieves and murderers going back several generations. However, in recent times, many in the family turned from their life of crime, and walked the straight and narrow.

One particular family from this line existed and they had a son who chose to live like his ancestors. This son robbed and killed his fellow man. He robbed and killed those who were strangers as well as his distant relatives, and anyone who he felt stood in his way.

This son went into hiding from the law and continued to bring terror upon his victims. He also tried to convince other family members to resurrect the old family way and to join him.

As it so happened, the sheriff came to the door of the son’s father looking for the son. The father told the sheriff, “I do not know where my son is.” This was a lie. While the father himself did not murder or rob, nor would he give direct support to his son, he would not turn his son over to the law. Deep down he sympathized with his son.

The sheriff asked the son’s mother to divulge the son’s whereabouts and she threw her hands up in the air and proclaimed, “I don’t know what my son does, where he is, nor do I want to know. What he does is his own business. Leave me be.” She did not live the life of a thief or murderer, and had not raised her son to be one, but once he became one, she put her head in the sand and chose to not accept what her son had become. She was ashamed of him, but loved him and dealt with him by ignoring his actions. She would never turn in her son.

The sheriff went to the son’s brother and inquired as to the son’s whereabouts. By all appearances, this brother was an upstanding man. He outwardly projected himself as a pious man. He gave to charity and widows. However, deep down, he sympathized with his brother and secretly gave him direct support. He would give his brother food and shelter, and hide him out from the law. He lied to the sheriff and said, “Am I my brother’s keeper? I don’t know where he is.”

The sheriff went a few houses down where the son’s uncle lived. This uncle lived an honest and peaceful life, and his children and their families lived the same way. However, he wasn’t very close to his brother and their family despite living two houses away. He said to the uncle, “Your family there, two houses down, has a son who is a murderer and thief. I inquired of them where your nephew is and I feel they all lied to me. Go to your brother for me. Explain to him that his son has caused great harm and done wrong to many people. Explain to him that his son sows discontent and does evil even to those distantly related to him. Impress upon your brother, his wife, and their other son, that this is unacceptable and that they need to turn the evil son over so that justice can be done and peace can come to this land again.”

The uncle heard the sheriff and replied, “These are my kin. I have my own family that I tend to. I raise my family my way, he raises his as he sees fit. It is not my place to go to my brother and ask him to turn his son over to you. Yes, his son gives our family a bad name, but don’t judge me because of my brother. Besides, if I were to go to my brother and instruct him as you have asked of me, I may draw anger from them and endanger my own family for alas, his son is known for killing and robbing anyone who disagrees with him. There is peace between us now and I wish to keep it that way. I wish you well.” Afterwards, the uncle thought, “I am not related to the sheriff. While I do not agree with my brother’s family, if I had to choose between my distant brother or the sheriff, I would choose my brother as he is family and the sheriff is not.”

Now, the son continued to rob and murder. Who is guilty for the son’s crimes?